Being Flexible
This past Sunday, a lot of youth ministers in Indianapolis, New Orleans, Minnesota and New York had an interesting decision to make – do you cancel your youth group for a football game? Whether you live in those areas or not, you have probably been faced with this decision before. I have numerous times as I live just outside Washington, DC and this is Redskin country. When the Redskins play, people watch – no matter how bad they have been lately.
Tim Schmoyer, who writes a youth ministry blog, was faced with this decision this week. He said this as he was polling others and what they do –
“Since I think teens are already given way too many excuses to put spirituality behind everything else, I don’t want our church to be part of enabling that. It’s not that I’m anti-football or even that I don’t think ministry can flex for current events. We cancel youth group for the Super Bowl, but for other games? It just doesn’t feel right to me. God always comes first, especially before a football game. Our standards for teens spiritual growth are already so low! I’m sure we’ll have a small crowd at youth group tomorrow night, which is fine with me. It’s not important that we have a large group, it’s important that we do the right thing for the right reasons and bring glory to God through it all. I’ll be more than happy to focus on the students who are there.”
I get what Tim is saying and I think this best sums up how I feel. HOWEVER, I think ultimately that there comes a point where we put aside our feelings and become a little flexible as a great opportunity is presented. Here is what I mean:
- For starters, when an event like the AFC and NFC championship game comes up (which this event was), it is a special event which means you show special consideration. If this was just a regular season or playoff game, you do not change plans, but football really is like soccer for so many other countries. We get very passionate about football and “our team” and when they are 1 victory away from the Super Bowl, that is a big deal. Sure, Christ should always come before all things, but when something takes hold of the whole city you live in, people want to watch and support their cities. But again, if this just a regular football game does not involve my city at all (other than the Super Bowl), I keep whatever I am doing on. For instance, I had a Parent/Teen relationship building gathering this week and I did not cancel my event. There were a ton of people interested in the game, but we had no city tie whatsoever so we had a pretty solid turnout.
- Secondly, rather than straight up canceling, I would alter my plans a bit. Instead of doing a regular “youth group” night, change it to incorporate watching the game together. Have your students invite their friends (especially non-believers) and center your night around fellowship and community building. Then, during halftime, shut the TV off and do a Bible study, sing some worship songs or even do some prayer and meditation. Sure, it may not be exactly what you had originally planned but the fact is you are leading them in Christ during that time which is the important thing.
As I have said above, I have had to make this decision many times and ultimately I change my plans. This is where I have to take my feelings out of it and look for the opportunity. I know some people will completely disagree with me and claim that I should never put a “youth group” event behind a secular activity. But in reality, I’m not putting Christ on the back-burner – just youth group. If you think the only time students can grow in Christ is through traditional “youth group” setting, then you probably have the wrong approach to youth ministry. “Youth group” is a tool, not an end game. The end game is being a fully devoted follower of Christ and you are simply providing steps to help your students get there. By being flexible and changing my plans a bit, I’m simply providing a different way for kids to experience Christ together. They will have a shared fellowship experience where they see Christ demonstrated in the lives of our leaders by the way we respond when our team does or doesn’t succeed.
Again, in a perfect world, I wish all my students would step up and put Christ before all things all the time. But, the reality is that they do not. In fact, I do not always put Christ 1st in all situations (sorry, true confession). So, I completely understand what Tim and so many other youth ministers feel about this situation. But again, I do believe it is part of my job to be flexible and to look for opportunities to present Christ in all situations. Even if it means I have to change plans a little bit.
TAKE A MINUTE and plan out what you will do the next time a special event comes up and interferes with a regularly scheduled youth event. How can your students still experience Christ during that change of plans?
So what do you think? Feel free to share your thoughts and comments.
Good thoughts, Tom! I like how you processed through the decision.
I'm not saying any youth group who canceled made the wrong decision, only that my conviction was that we should still have it. However, as you mentioned, we did alter the evening a bit by getting together early (YG starts at 6:30, the game started at 5:45) and watched it instead of our normal opening game/activity time. Around 7:15, though, we turned it off and went with our normal lesson and discussion, and turned it back on when we were finished. The students knew that was the plan ahead of time and the 5 that showed up (as opposed to the 30-40 that usually come) were there because they were not interested in football. The others wanted to see the entire game without turning it off, so they didn't come, which is fine — that's their choice.
Thanks for posting your thoughts, Tom! Good discussion to have and think through.
Yeah, I did hesitate in mentioning your thoughts because I didn't want it coming off as a negative because as I said, I can completely agree with your thoughts as I have had those as well. It is such a tough call and probably each Church will have a different take on what to do. But, as you started on your initial thought poll, this is a very good discussion to have and something that we should think through before it is right up in front of us. Thanks Tim.
I have one set of initials for you: DVR!
Couple of thoughts. 1) Agree, fellowship time is important. Easy for that to fit in the YG parameters.
2) Saying that watching a football game rather than going to Youth Group is saying that football is more important than Christ is a hard thing for me to swallow. There are times that I choose to do events that I love rather than go to Christian events that are offered at the same time. Sometimes I am choosing them and setting up idols in my life of that of Christ. Sometimes, it is just a choice that I have made that I believe will be a good thing in my life.
Just food for thought.